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You'll love the smell of Grapalm in the morning! Cut a wide swath through the hunger jungle with this classic jellied treat, back by popular demand!
Grapalm:
Price per 55 gallon drum: $19.08*
FUN FACTS! -
GrapalmTM (grape jellied petroleum) is a registered trademark
of Tastee-Snax Munitions, Inc.!
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The name "Grapalm" is derived from the words "grape" and "palmitate"!
GrapalmTM is 46% polystyrinated sugar, 33% grape concentrate,
21% benzene and 100% delicious!
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Technically, there is no proven link between GrapalmTM
and leukemia!
[*prices subject to crude oil market price fluctuations]
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| Enjoy the finest beverage mother nature has to offer. Now in value-paks of six.
55 Gallon Fun Pouches ($100 per unit)
Optional Modification: MU-CH-21 DISCLOSURE: Standard issue MU-42 can be combined with theobroma cacao additive. This additive is commonly procured from equatorial regions in a non-volatile state. After import the additive is fermented, heated, and pulverized into a soluble powder form. This powder form is then dissolved homogenously throughout the MU-42 solution.
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| The classic American beverage is back! Join the coalition of the chilling! 55 Gallon Drums ($125 per unit)
When life gives you lemons, machine them into lemonade.
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| (discontinued pending investigation)
Price per 55 gallon drum: N/A
DISCLOSURE: A class-action lawsuit has been initiated against TASTEE-SNAX MUNITIONS, INC., manufacturers of Agent Orange JuliusTM. ARMYBAKESALE.COM and THE UNITED STATES ARMY have been named as co-defendants. If you believe yourself eligible to be named as a co-plaintiff, you may register as such by contacting Peggy Weintraub, director of legal affairs at Amnesty International, by phoning (212) 807-8400 or visiting www.amnesty.org and downloading the correct forms. Also, co-plaintiffs are advised to refrain from consuming GrapalmTM. |
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